Moser’s Shorty Spank Bank Photo Album
Moser’s Shorty Spank Bank Photo Album
By: Moser
When a racer retires, what is a super fan supposed to do?? I’m not sure yet. It’s still day to day, butt remembering the good times with a stroll down memory lane in pictures seemed like a start. If you want to follow my #29daysofshorty on Instagram, you can check it out on @clmoser. If you want to see pictures of my hot wife on snapchat, follow me at @keefer120.
I remember the first time I met Shorty, like it was yesterday. Like most Supercross fans, I got to the race in Seattle early enough to watch practice and check out the pits. I hadn’t waited in line to get an autograph from a rider since I was a kid, but it was a rainy day in Seattle and the pits weren’t too busy. I hopped in line to say hi to my favorite rider Andrew Short. Who isn’t a fan of Shorty? Butt, why he’s my favorite rider is a much longer story for another time. Anyways, it was freezing that year in Seattle… that wet damp cold that chills you to the bone. Shorty had on this sweet RedBull beanie and I immediately wanted it. For people that don’t know, RedBull doesn’t market any of their clothing, it’s for athletes only, basically the polar opposite of Monster. So, I pulled out my wallet and offered Shorty $100 cash for his hat, I felt it was a fair offer. We’ll, he wasn’t really amused by my antics, and when I asked for a picture, he kept his distance. Little did Shorty know this was only the beginning of a “friendship”’ that will last forever. I wish I wood have hung onto the autographed poster I got from Shorty that night… I remember giving it to a young kid standing behind me in the stands, butt the kid was stoked.
Another year of friendship, and another year at Seattle Supercross. This year, we both surprised each other with custom shirts, ironic really. I gave Shorty a tee shirt with “Moser is my #1 fan” printed on it and Shorty gave me a “#1 Fan” custom jersey. I was blown away and had the jersey framed and still have it proudly displayed in my office.
When you’re a superfan and your rider gets injured, you have to do something. Injuries are hard on a rider and a superfan both, butt it’s just a part of this sport. Over the years I’ve sent Shorty some different things; a bell to ring, so Jacki could wait on him hand and foot. Some “lube” that was called elbow grease, for when he broke both his elbows. I wanted to insure he was getting the best medical care, so I sent Jacki a nurse outfit. There must have been some confusion because I got a picture with Shorty in the nurse outfit and never got one with Jacki wearing it.
A couple years ago, it was my wife Mrs. Moser’s 30th birthday, so we decided to go to the Vegas Supercross. My mom, aka Momma Moser, my sister and Jacki also came down. To say the weekend was entertaining wood be an understatement. Friday night it seemed like the entire moto industry was at the circle bar. Momma Moser was helping Nate with bike cleaning and maintenance on race day. In less than 29 seconds Mrs. Moser and Jacki both lost gambling. Best of all though was getting this great family photo.
With no Seattle Supercross on the schedule this year, I was determined to attend another race to watch for Shorty’s final season. Extending a work trip thru Santa Clara on the way home almost worked out perfect. Then Shorty had his big get off. I was already committed so I still went but it was definitely not the same without Shorty racing. Shorty’s wrench Nate surprised me with a number plate that I’m super pumped on. The BTO team also had to put Shorty’s bike up out of reach so I wood stop touching it.
The year we “rented a DBO” and went to Seattle Supercross was a blur and not the good kind. At one point Chicken showed up in our room at 4am wearing a Coors Light box as a hat. It’s a real toss up who laughed harder about a full grown man wearing the Shorty pj’s, because both Chicken and Shorty thought it was awesome. I bought these Shorty pj’s for the entire family, my kids thought they were awesome, Mrs. Moser thought it was pretty creepy.
Not many riders or mechanics like it when you touch their bike. Now add in the fact I’m sitting on Shorty’s bike with a cardboard cutout of my BFF and taking pictures under the factory KTM tent. Looking back at some of these pictures amazes even me that they happened.
At Washougal this year, I wanted to do some kind of Shorty farewell/send- off thank you something or other. I think I have to credit Mrs. Moser with the silly string idea and showering Shorty in orange silly string after crossing the finish line seemed fitting. Also, with any retirement you are required to receive a gold watch so I presented him with that as well, hopefully he doesn’t try to pawn it.
I have so many awesome photos over the years with Shorty, the Shorty family, and the teams he’s ridden for. The access he gave me was unreal and I’ll never forget it. This isn’t the end, it’s just the beginning of the next chapter. I assure you, more selfies with Shorty and I are sure to cum in the future.
Moser
Please send any and all comments to jasonw@racerxill.com